If there's a thought I can't stand it's one related to stagnating. Doing the same thing in the same place, year after year and then wondering where life went. Part of it is connected to a feeling that if you aren't at the cutting edge of things then you are just part of the crowd. This underlying itch to have the latest things, go to the cool places, hang out with the right folk even. Society pushes this materialistic message that everything is happening right now and if you aren't on the cool gadget train... then guess what. This is to the point where people are ridiculed for their old phones, old clothes, old jokes and old references. I'm pretty convinced now that these "needs' aren't healthy but somehow in life I dance this tightrope between self aware, compassionate, happy with myself and one utterly fuelled by the need for better, cooler, faster and more "fulfilling" STUFF in my life. There's a fork in that journey and it goes wrong, of course, with the assumption that you get fulfilled by things and not experiences.
Last year, determined to find more authentic happiness in my life, I made A LOT of changes.
Having reached the top of my chosen profession as a CTO I was very proud of myself but I can't figure out why I didn't truly realise what I already knew, i.e. that working for a company, you always have a boss, the CEO answers to the Board and the Board to the Shareholders. Unless your job is one where you choose what you do, you are never the master of your days, your time or really, your destiny.
My days were definitely not my own. I wasn't seeing my kids grow up and actually I was quite happy to hide behind work as three kids (almost under two) was a bit much, especially if one has special needs. I read a stat that said this is pretty much the norm for men who reach a certain level and who have kids. You just can't be Clarke Kent, Superman and Superdad all at once. Who knows where your own sense of self goes in this circumstance and how are you supposed to maintain a relationship is beyond me. Those first five years require a great deal of sacrifice from parents and if you are lucky, after the battle you'll find each other again and hopefully you still like what you find.
At the same time I knew that what I loved was leading by example and seeing others grow and that I still liked the challenge of learning new things. Most of all though, want I wanted was some creative control of my life back and I still selfishly wanted to get some of that through the activity and output of my work. I'm fortunate to have had people around me to take this inspiration from. Really good people.
First thing I did was quit my job. Bold but necessary or foolish and reckless. With hindsight, I am not sure which, but sometimes you just know when a job is going to be an energy detractor and frankly I didn't believe in the company I was with. I would encourage anyone in the same boat to vote strongly with their feet.
Next, I got in shape. After creative outlets, exercise is the next easiest victim of our busyness! I selfishly buggered off to France and learnt some Yoga from a wonderful teacher and have maintained and built on what I learnt. It is one of those experiences that requires your full attention and therefore when you do it you not only feel great but it gives you some separation from everyday thoughts. I do some Yoga virtually every day.
I started a daily meditation practice and what started as a curiosity toward mindfulness has become an essential part of my life. It has, after a year of practice finally given me some space from the never ending cycle of thoughts that generally aren't healthy and that I had previously used to drive relentless scenario planning to "win" at work. Any game where you win at work is of course a nonsense because someone else loses and that has a high human, and ultimately, commercial cost.
I also went and did a course on making bicycles. It was incredible. For 20 years, software based products have been my thing, and some of them I am truly proud of too but there is no substitute for building something with your own hands. It gave me a strong desire to build more stuff personally that I could sell and that would make money when I was asleep.
So I started Delivery Craft and under that umbrella, I started Disruptive Distillery as a way to generate product ideas and to help people bring them to market. The Distillery also allows me to exercise my creative gene and to help people evolve and ignite their ideas. Delivery Craft is how I make money day to day and I promised myself that I would not work on client assignments more than 10-12 days a month so that I could invest my other time in developing the business, my family and into other creative ideas. Don't get me wrong, when I am working, I work extremely hard. I am one of the first in the office and I try to make every hour genuinely productive. I take less meetings and I back myself when I am confident in a decision. That free time quickly evolved into advisory opportunities and some of the best networking I have ever done. Meeting talented positive people doing great things is a gift in itself.
Nowadays, even though it's early days and I don't know what will happen next I do feel blessed and even though I say it myself, I needed a huge shake up to push me into the decision and it cost me on the way in both money and relationships. I spent a lot of my savings as I reshaped things and I sold my favourite possession, my car, to make it happen. I figured that if I was doing what I loved that more cars would come my way.
Rytyu, as I have said was an idea I had cultivated for a while but this period of change was the catalyst to get it done. I was used to running teams of many hundreds of people and in some places i had teams that made awesome apps. Now I wanted to learn what it was like delivering an app in a very different environment:
1) I wasn't an expert in any aspect of the iOS development process, I knew a fair amount about operating systems, a bit about Xcode, something about design and a smattering of what it took to get the app into the store.
2) Budget definitely was an issue. I had been used to pretty much unconstrained access to funding in some very big and successful corporates but now I was essentially asking two very talented people to work in their spare time for less money than they could normally earn. For the money, I know we did an excellent job.
3) I literally had to do everything else myself. I thought up the concept, I did the requirements, the spec, the marketing, the website, the social sites and a lot of the launch process (with some help) myself. The app review process is a total lottery depending on whose doing the reviews this week and which rules they fancy wheeling out. This was the amazing thing, however many units sold, and we have sold some all round the world (which I am really pleased by) it was the journey that was the destination that matter. Along the way I met amazing collaborators who are really good people.
Luckily for me, the journey is still in progress. Without any real encouragement, Stuart, who wrote the code has continued to develop features. Not even the slightest mention of payment has been made (although I will find a way to compensate him).
So, very soon we are launching a new version of Rytyu. It now has a number of new illustration options for many of life's wonderful events including Birthdays, Weddings, Easter, Christmas and soon to be a hot topic, Valentine's Day. We have also added the ability for you to select any image form your phone to use as a custom envelope image a bit like a postcard, but a letter, well a Rytyu.
We hope that you will tell all your friends about this, preferably in a Rytyu but we will gladly accept your Tweets, Facebook updates and any emails you care to write to your contacts to spread the word.
I'm glad the journey is still going and I wish everyone happiness in their own travels. Letters, are an incredible way of marking the journey in a way that can truly bring people with you and so I hope you all write one soon.
Justin
